DOOM Magazine- 6 Months and Still Kicking!
Once again, the forces of good have failed MISERABLY.

As of March 10th, 2003, DOOM Magazine is 6 months old! We at DOOM are all very excited (The Diva is trying her best not to soil her camisole from the rapture of it all) We're looking forward to many more months of bloodletting and eternal bacchanal behavior!

Thanks to all of you who have been reading regularly, and we hope you find our magazine insulting yet enjoyable!

And you can have your damn statue back, too!
Namby-pamby whining in the Oval Office? Color me shocked!

According to CNN.com, the US Government will be making a few changes in their dietary language-

The restaurant menus in the three House office buildings will change the name of "french fries" to "freedom fries," a culinary rebuke of France, stemming from anger over the country's refusal to support the U.S. position on Iraq. Ditto for "french toast," which will now be know as "freedom toast." The name changes were spearheaded by two Republican lawmakers who plan to hold a news conference Tuesday to make the name changes official on the menus. As if France didn't think low enough of us already- imagine how embarassed they'll be when they find out that french fries are named so not for their nationality, but for the shape in which they are cut- but given this IS the Bush administration... Although the name will be changed, no official information has been given on whether or not the fatasses will cut back on the amount of freedom fries they will be consuming, or what patriotic Americans should order when they are in the drive-thru at good old American McDonald's.

And please be sure to end your answer with "su ka"
Leave it to the Japanese....

Japanese TV executives from Nippon TV have bought the rights to the long-time favorite gameshow, Jeopardy. Jeopardy, a heady trivia game featuring a dull Canadian host and equally dull contestants is a big hit among substitute teachers, dental hygienists, stamp collectors, and other such dullards in the States, but will sensation-starved Japan take interest in it all? Nippon executives are hopeful.

The show, which will be released under the name "Suprise CarryCarry Blossomu" will be premiering at the end of the month in a lucrative primetime slot, and will feature some new twists: In lieu of playing to score yen, each correct answer made by a player will result in a large couch with the player's name on it to be moved across a gameboard-like floor with the goal of reaching the end before the other players. There are also special penalties for incorrect responses such as low-powered tasers beneath the seats of the contestants.

Also noteable, as part of a promotion for sponsoring the show, Japanese candy company Happy Hello will be donating a complimentary box of their new product, Ambulence Rainbow Yesterday, to each studio audience member.

And once again, we are given sound evidence that absolutely nothing is sacred in the land of the rising sun.